In 2008 I married the love of my life. In that same year I finally resigned from my government job where I had been working for many years. Leaving the government was something the universe was giving me signs to do for years, but I hung on there for a while unsure if it was the best decision as fear, safety and security can take hold of us too much sometimes. It was a secure position and it provided some level of significance also. However, in the end I stepped off the cliff so to speak and left as it was time to honour who I was and become more in alignment with my truth and who I really am. Nevertheless, the experience in my early days was insightful.
Since making these two big decisions, my life and I have changed dramatically and it continues to do so. First of all, my life is not driven by fear. I transcended that the moment I left my job in 2008. I am not afraid to make the big decisions I need to make in life and do what needs to be done for my ultimate happiness and to be aligned with my soul and life purpose. I have learnt it is often the things that we fear to do the most that brings about the most positive and impactful changes to our lives and who we are.
So often people ask me, ‘but what should I do first?’. I will ask them what are the one or two things you have desperately wanted to do for some time but you have been too afraid to make that decision? Maybe you should start there?
To make room for more of what feeds you and makes you feel good in your life, you must be willing to first let go of things that drain you and you know you are not in alignment with anymore. Now, this could be a person, relationships, situation or job, but it could also be a way of being. Maybe you have a toxic habit that rules your life; maybe you need to get into shape and exercise and eat better in order to feel better, get well or even feel worthy enough to find love again? Maybe you need to go and study so you can get that job and in order to do that you need to let go of something or someone who has stopped you.
The greatest drain we experience can be toxic relationships. If they are not encouraging you and supporting your growth and the relationship is not stuck in toxic ruts or patterns then it is time to consider how this can change or whether you should let this go. If the other partner is not willing to support and encourage change and growth both in the relationship and individually then you may be better off to let them go rather than hanging on for years in the hope that they will change.
Does your work feed you?
Does it provide the financial security you need for yourself and your family?
Does it challenge you and push you out of your comfort zone here and there.
Does it hold the space for you to be more and show more of what you are capable of?
When you realise what you need to change and decide that you are going to actually act on those changes, your life will then move into transition mode. This can be a tough place for some and exciting for others because everything about your life will change. Your whole daily routine will change and for some of you the person that you are used to seeing everyday will change. You will need some time to go through this transition until your feet feel secure in a new place.
For those of you who like the safety of the familiar you may find this hard and it may take you the longest time to get here; for others who have been craving some life and adventure, every day is something new and exciting that is waiting for you and your new life. It is all about perspective.
Soul Love
Rebecca-Lee
